What's long and thin, covered in skin, red in parts, and goes in tarts? ... Full text

There was a guy in his sports car speeding across a bridge when there was the blue and red flash of a Police car. Fuck, thought the man as he pulled over to where the cop was on the other side of the bridge. "Licence and registration please sir." said the cop coming up the window. The guy gave him his licence and waited. "So Mr Jones, what is it you do for a living?" perused the cop. "Well" replied the guy, "I'm a cunt stretcher. First I get one hand in there, then two hands until I'm ... Full text