Just after World War 2, a reporter was interviewing the head nun of a monastery in Italy regarding her experiences during the war.
"Oh it was terrible, terrible." She cried, "First the Italians raped us all except sister Matilda. Then the Germans raped us all except sister Matilda and then the Americans raped us all except sister Matilda."
"Oh I'm so sorry, it must be very difficult for you." replied the reporter, "But I'm curious, you said they all raped you except sister Matilda. ... Full text

Two guys John and Eddie were fishing by the banks of a lake. John was catching fish after fish but Eddie was not even getting a nibble.
Finally exasperated, Eddie asked John, "Hey, how come you're getting so many fish and I'm not getting anything? What am I doing wrong?"
"What are you using for bait?" Asked John.
"Just regular bait, worms." Replied Eddie.
"Man, fish don't eat worms these days." said John, "You gotta use the right kind of bait to catch fish now a ... Full text