Blonde jokes

Q. How Can You Tell A blond Was AT tHE COMPUTER
A. The Joy STICK IS WET

a blonde went into a shop and askd for a blonde hair die ... she went home and put some on her hair .. but she didnt relise dat it was actually brown hairdye(becuz da shop assistant was blonde and gave er da rong 1) so she washed her hair ... and she was cleva from dat day onn ..... hahahha dya getit ????? lmfao .......
m jes playin yall .......

What dose a barbie doll and brittany spears have in common?
they bothe are blonde,they both are brain dead, and the both are made of plastic.

Their are these ther girls k . Well they were driviing in thir truck the blone was sitin in the back and the other girls were in the front of the car well they crash into a lake the brunette and red heads come out of the water and about 30 min. later the blonde comes up and they ask her were she has been and she says i could not get the tel gate open.

There were two blondes and they get stuck on an island and the fisrt blonde goes what do you think is closer the moon and melbourne
the second blonde goes DER the moon you cant see melbourne from here can you

there was a dumb blonde driving down a motorway and a truck driver was trying to overtake but she was all over the road. so he yelled at her pullover. so she pulled over and the truck driver took out some chalk and drew a circle and told her to stay inside it. then he got some scizzors and cut all the leather in the car.and the women began to laugh. so he got an axe and hacked the car to bits.but the women was laughing even more. so the man got some petrol poured it on the car and set it alight. he turned to find the woman on the ground in laughter. the man yelled at her what the hell is wrong with you. and the woman said every time you turned away i stepped out of the cicle.
based ...   Full text

Q: What does a blonde say when you blow in her ear?
A: "GEE! thanks for the refill!"

There were 11 women hanging onto a rope that was hanging down a cliff. Ten were blonde, and one was a brunette. They all decided that one person should let go because if they didn't then the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go, so finally the brunette thought to herself ???I'll let go.???
After a really touching speech from the brunette saying she would let go, all of the blondes started clapping.

there is a brunette skipping down a railroad track saying 21,21,21,21 so a
blonde comes and said that looks like fun so she starts skipping saying
21,21,21,21 all of a sudden a train comes and the brunette moves the blonde gets hit next thing you know the brunettes back on saying 22,22,22
22.

A blonde woman was speeding down the street,when she realized she was being pulled over.The blonde pulls over to the side of the road.The blonde woman cop gets of the car, and walks over.She asks the blonde for I.D.,the blonde asks what does it look like.The blonde cop says,"its square and it has your picture on it.So the blonde looks through her purse and pulls out a compact and opens it,she asks is this it?The blonde cop takes it and looks at it and says," im sorry i didnt know you were a cop".

How do you tell apart a blonde female from a blonde male?. Answer. A blonde female has a higher sperm count

what do you call a blonde standing on her head????
A brunette with bad breathe!

What do you give the blonde who has everything?
Penicillin

Q: What do u call a blonde who dyes her hair
A: Artificial intelligance

A blonde storms into her house banging doors and shouting at her boyfriend as she's just heard that he's been seeing another women."This is the final straw!" she shrieks."I'm going to kill myself!" She grabs a loaded pistol and holds it to her head.Her boyfriend thinks this is ridiculous and can't stop laughing at her."I don't know why you're laughing!"she screams "You're next!!!"

Your so blonde when you went through a deaf person area you said shhhh..... be quiet!

wat do u get when u cross a blonde with a turtoise?? An even slower thinker

What do you call a dead blonde in the closet?
Last years hide and go seek winner!

there were two thin sisters one said, which one do u think is closer , the moon or london?The other sister says,"duh the moon because u can't see london".

There was this blonde who was driving along the road and swerved a tree, swerved another tree, and kept swerving trees untiil she rolled off the road. When the police got there, they were that she was out of the car totally unharmed and applying lipstick. She said to the police that there were heaps of trees in front of her and that she couldn't keep swerving them. The policeman replied,"There's not a tree in 30 miles, that was your air-freshener swinging back and forth."

a blond and a brunette are talking about why everyone thinks blondes are dumb.So the blonde says i hav an idea,( to the brunetts amazement) the brunette says to whats ur idea.The blonde says ill dye my hair the same colour as urs to see if ppl can tell the difference.So later on that day the blonde dyes her hair brown.Then they walk up to a guy in the street and says one ov us is a blonde can u tell wich 1 it is, the man says the 1 on the right is the blonde, the blonde says how did u no i was a blonde the man says because ur hair is orange.

a guy takes his blonde gf to her first football game, after the game he askes her how she liked it, she said i liked the tight pants and big muscles, but i didnt understand what all the fighting over 25 cents was about, the guy askes what she means, and shes like well at the begining of the game they flipped a coin and for the rest of the time someone was always shouting - ILL GET THE QUARTERBACK!

what do u tell a woman with two black eyes ??
nothing you already told her twice

There was a blonde who had just bought a new ferrari, she was so happy that she started doing doughnuts in front of a truck driver.
She kept doing it until the truk driver got really, really angry, so the truck driver got out of his truck and pulled the blonde over. He told her to get out of the car, so the truckie drawed a circle and told the blonde to get in it and dont get out until i tell you too. Then he started smashing the car, slashing the tyres.
The blonde started laughing which got the truckie really ANGRY so he started totally smashing the car. By this time the blonde was cracking up. The truckie got pissed and asked the blonde what the hell was so funny, and the ...   Full text

Theres two blonde guys and they go for a hike in the woods. The first blonde guys says to the other "I gotta take a crap". The second blonde guys says to the first, "go behind that tree over there". The first blonde guy says to the second, "but i dont have any toilet paper,". The second blonde guy replies" just use a dollar". So the first blonde guy goes behind the tree and comes out ten minutes later with crap all othe his hands. The second blonde guy says to the first, " what took your so long....and why do you have crap all over your hands?'' The first blonde replies, " Have you ever tried to wipe your ass with three quarters, two dimes, and a nickel?''

there was a blond a red head and a brunette standing outside of the building the lived in.
the brunette looks down and exclaims,
"that looks like cum"
the red head bends over and takes a wiff and exclaims,
"that smells like cum"
the blond dips her finger in and has a taste and exclaims
"yep it is cum, but it's no-one from our building"

3 woman were stranded on a island, A brunette,A red head, And a blonde, They were walking on the desserted island and suddenly came across a genie bottle lieing in the sand, So the brunette picks up the genie bottle and rub's it 3 time's, Out came a genie on the third rub, the genie said 'I will allow you each one wish that i will grant' So the brunette replies i wish to go back to my home, Poof! she disapears and is back home. The genie said now i will grant an another wish, the red head replies i wish to be back with my family, Poof!, she disapears and is placed back with her family, Now the blonde is alone with the genie and she is sitting next to a tree crying, The genie ask's her ...   Full text

Q. What do you get when a blonde ddyes her hair black?
A. A very stupid Brunett
Q. Why did you change your hair color, Blondie?
A. Somebody told me all the blondes were dieing, and I want to live.
Q. Do you know the difference between a natural blonde, and a bleach blonde?
A. About 100 IQ points

A blonde is round at a friend's house for a barbeque when she comes running into the kitchen and tells her friend she's just been stung on the hand by a bee."Oh dear,"says her friend sympathetically"Do you want to put some ointment on it?" "Don't be silly!" laughs the blonde."It'll be miles away by now!"

Ok, A blonde girl really needs some money, so she goes over to her neighbors house and ask's him if he has anything she can do to earn some money. So the guy says yeah sure, you can white wash my Porch and I will pay you when I get home later today. So the blonde says ok and the guy leaves. The guy comes home later that day to find his Porch not white washed yet. The blonde comes out of the garage's side door and says Do I get paid yet...the guy says you were suppose to white wash my Porch. The blonde says I did, But its a Jaguar, Not a Porsche..