What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish?
Every morning you'll rise and shine!
How many books can you put in an empty backpack?
One! After that its not empty! (
What washes up on very small beaches?
Microwaves!
Why do candle trimmers work so few days a week?
They only work on wick-ends!
What's the difference between a TV and a newspaper?
Ever tried swatting a fly with a TV?
What breaks when you say it?
Silence!
If Phil & Lil were a fruit, what kind would they be?
A pear (pair)