Donald Duck walked into a drugstore and asked for a packet of condoms.
"Certainly, sir," said the lady behind the counter. "Shall I put them on your bill?"
"No way!" replied Donald Duck. "What do you think I am, a dickhead?"
Full text

You know those types of girls that are butt-ugly but the only thing that they have going for them are a set of big tits? there it is.
God was feeling a bit worn out, after all creating the entire universe and earth is a big task so he decided he would turn over the task of creating a NEW batch of humans to an apprentice. The apprentice wasn't that bright so God left simple instructions, just make them look like Adam and Eve. So the apprentice went off to work and started creating ... Full text