A guy walks into a bar and says "You know wat, lawyers are assholes." a guy in the back stands up and says "i take offense to that." The first guy looks at him and says "why, you a lawyer?" and he replys "no, im an asshole" Full text

There was a Russian a Cuban an american and a lawyer on a train. The Russian started the conversation with "Mother Russia has the best vodka ever and we have so much we can just throw it away." So the Russian throws a bottle out the window. Then the Cuban speaks up "Cuba has the best cigars and we have so much we could throw them away." So the Cuban throws some cigars out the window. Well the american say's '' we have too many lawers we can throw them away'' so the American gets up and walks ... Full text